Your Strengths Aren't Always Your Strengths

There’s a phrase you hear a lot in development:

“Play to your strengths.”

Sounds sensible.

And, generally, I agree with it.

I’m a Gallup Certified Strengths Coach. I’ve spent plenty of time helping people understand what they naturally do well and how they can use more of it.

But there’s a slight problem with the phrase.

Because your strengths aren’t always your strengths.

Sometimes they’re exactly the thing that’s getting in your way.

A strength isn't automatically a good thing

One of the biggest misconceptions I see with CliftonStrengths is the idea that the things at the top of your profile are your good stuff, while everything towards the bottom is the stuff you're a bit sh*te at.

It doesn't really work like that.

Your CliftonStrengths profile tells you where your natural patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving are most likely to sit.

What it doesn't tell you is whether you're using those patterns particularly well.

And that's the interesting bit.

Because the same natural talent can be incredibly useful in one situation and an absolute pain in the arse in another.

Take Analytical.

Analytical can help you question assumptions, look for evidence and make better decisions.

Brilliant.

But Analytical can also keep asking for another piece of information when everyone else is ready to make a decision and crack on.

Same strength.

Very different impact.

I can see it in my own strengths

My own Top 5 are Relator, Belief, Maximiser, Empathy and Analytical.

And I genuinely love them.

They're a massive part of how I coach, facilitate and work with people.

But I can also tell you how every single one of them can get me into trouble.

Relator means I naturally value deep, genuine relationships.

That's great for coaching.

But it can also mean I invest heavily in the people I already know and trust rather than making the effort to build new relationships.

Belief gives me a strong sense of what's important to me.

That can give me conviction.

It can also make me bloody stubborn.

Maximiser means I'm constantly looking at something and thinking:

How could we make this better?

Useful when you're designing a leadership programme.

Slightly less useful when something is already perfectly good and everyone else would quite like me to stop fiddling with it.

Empathy helps me pick up on what people might be feeling.

That's incredibly useful in a coaching conversation.

But if I'm not careful, it can also make me spend too much time worrying about how somebody might react to something I need to say.

And then there's Analytical.

I love evidence. I want things to make sense.

Which is useful.

Until I find myself analysing something for the 47th time that probably just needs a decision.

None of those strengths suddenly become weaknesses.

They're strengths being used in an unhelpful way.

And that's an important distinction.

Your strengths can become too loud

I sometimes describe it as turning the volume up too high.

At the right volume, a strength helps you.

Turn it up too far and it can start creating unintended consequences.

Someone with Achiever might have incredible drive and stamina.

Turn it up too far and stopping can feel like failure.

Someone with Responsibility might be incredibly dependable.

Turn it up too far and suddenly they're carrying everyone else's problems because they can't bring themselves to say no.

Someone with Command might be brilliant at providing direction when everyone else is hesitating.

Turn it up too far and nobody else gets a bloody word in.

Someone with Harmony might naturally find common ground and reduce unnecessary conflict.

Turn it up too far and an important disagreement gets avoided because keeping the peace feels easier.

The answer isn't:

“Stop using that strength.”

It's:

“Learn to notice the volume.”

Strengths aren't excuses

This is where strengths work can go wrong.

Someone learns their profile and suddenly their strengths become an explanation for everything.

“I'm an Activator. I'm just impatient.”

“I've got Harmony. I don't really do conflict.”

“I'm Strategic. Detail isn't my thing.”

“I've got Competition. That's just how I am.”

Nope.

Understanding why a behaviour might come naturally to you can be really useful.

Using it as an excuse to carry on behaving badly isn't.

Your strengths should increase your self-awareness, not reduce your accountability.

That's one of the most important parts of strengths development for me.

Your profile isn't there to put you in a box.

It's there to help you understand the box you might occasionally put yourself in.

Context matters

There's another reason your strengths aren't automatically strengths.

The situation gets a vote.

You might naturally be brilliant at generating ideas.

That doesn't mean the team needs another idea.

You might naturally want to build consensus.

That doesn't mean consensus is what's needed when a decision has to be made today.

You might naturally want to move quickly.

That doesn't mean the person sitting opposite you doesn't need another ten minutes to think.

The most effective people don't simply ask:

“What are my strengths?”

They start asking:

“What does this situation need from me, and how can I use my strengths to provide it?”

That's a much more useful question.

Because strengths aren't about becoming more you regardless of what's happening around you.

They're about becoming more intentional about how you show up.

This gets even more interesting in teams

Now put ten people in a room.

Suddenly it's not just about how your strengths show up.

It's about how they interact with everybody else's.

Your desire to move quickly might feel energising to one person and reckless to another.

Your need to ask questions might feel thoughtful to you and frustrating to the person who's desperate for a decision.

Your directness might feel wonderfully clear to one colleague and unnecessarily abrupt to someone else.

Nobody necessarily has to be wrong.

They might simply be experiencing the same behaviour differently.

That's why I think some of the best strengths conversations aren't:

“What are everyone's Top 5?”

They're:

“What happens when all of these strengths have to work together?”

That's where a colourful team grid starts becoming an actual team-development conversation.

Don't just know your strengths. Learn how to use them.

Finding out your CliftonStrengths profile can be fascinating.

You'll probably read parts of it and think:

Bloody hell. That's me.

That's the ah-ha.

But the useful bit comes afterwards.

Where does this help me?

Where might I overdo it?

What does this look like when I'm under pressure?

How might other people experience it?

Which situations bring out the best of this strength?

When might I need to dial it down?

And what might I need from people who naturally think differently to me?

Because knowing your Top 5 isn't the destination.

It's the starting point.

Your strengths don't determine whether you're effective.

How you use them does.